The Language of the Book

[Joseph_Lofthouse]

We currently work on a French language version of the book. I communicated these ideas to the translator, and want to share them with you as well.

After I started writing the book, I chose to move it strongly in the direction of non-dualistic language.

I wrote some sections of the book a decade ago, therefore, the older sections of the book may not fully comply with my desired language usage. I failed often along the way, getting progressively better. The new way of thinking and writing severely taxed my abilities. I made myself ill, writing 16 hours per day for months on end. As an act of self-preservation, I published the book without fixing the non-compliant language. I intend to fully fix the language in any future editions.

My current writing complies fairly well with my desired syntax. It took a long sustained struggle.

My preference for non-dualistic language adds to the charm, and inclusive feel of the book. I intended to stay away from writing in omniscient god mode, and dogmatic mode – “This is that”. Those sorts of statements can evoke contrariness, getting people riled up. I opted instead to describe things in peaceful, neutral, inclusive terms. (I just reviewed a few pages, and feel horrified at how bad I complied, and pleased at how easily I can see the errors today, and imagine easy fixes).

The rough draft of my book contained many references to things that “evil” corporations do and to “bad” choices that the seed companies make. I deleted them for the sake of non-activism. I want to do what I love, instead of spending my energy on activism. I want my language as non-activist as possible. Black/white thinking lead me to anger and bitterness towards the evil. It devoured me until I chose the path of peace and goodwill. I can’t change politics, or the world, but I can change myself. When I change my language, I change my emotions.

We call my chosen writing style e-prime. It avoids using the verb “to be”: be, being, been, am, is, are, was, were, and contractions using them.

I grew up in a family, church, and culture where things got classified into dualistic pairs: all/none, true/false, good/evil, white/black, etc. The verb “to be” played a key role in that. These days, I try to live in the messy middle, where nuance thrives. The tantra training that I took just before writing the book teaches the non-dualistic unity of all things. E-prime syntax helps unite things together (both/and), rather than separating them (either/or). I couldn’t have written the book without using the principles of e-prime and tantra.

Science splits living things apart into separate species. In my garden, I observe the indistinct nature of species boundaries. Seed companies split species apart into separate varieties. I really don’t have room for that in my garden or thinking. I want to put aside the dualistic thinking of my youth.

I want to avoid dogmatism, and making inflexible rules. I want my writing to reflect openness. I fail sometimes, and I succeed sometimes. Getting easier. My life dramatically changed while writing the book, and struggling mightily to write with less dualistic syntax. The new mentality seeps over into my non-writing life and thinking.

Here’s a couple of articles.

Sharpen Your Critical Thinking With E-Prime - Litemind

E-Prime

[Justin]

Very interesting!

[MashaZ (Masha Zager)]

E-prime seems like a great technique for making one’s writing more specific and accurate (as well as all the other advantages you mention). Thanks for bringing it up; I’d never heard of it.

[Joseph_Lofthouse]

A lifetime of momentum doesn’t change overnight. I really enjoy the shift in consciousness that accompanied the shift in writing style. I attribute a good deal of my current happiness to doing less black/white thinking.

I believe that my opening post fully complies with e-prime syntax. I only find one pidgin sentence. My speaking uses more pidgin. A few friends whine about my speaking, which doesn’t comply with e-prime as well as my public writing.

[MashaZ (Masha Zager)]

I also find it helpful to think in terms of what has or hasn’t happened yet, rather than in terms of what must happen. For example, seed companies haven’t yet [done all the things we would like them to do], rather than seed companies inevitably [fail to do what we want.]

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

I think e-prime is a good writing style, and there are other equally good writing styles, and I think you have chosen one that’s superb for the purpose you’ve chosen. I also think the purpose you’ve chosen is good. So I’m delighted. Well done!

I tend to change the writing style I’m using depending on the purpose for my writing. This is most obvious in my storytelling.

I wrote a book from the point of view of an autistic character who never asks questions, and who has no internal monologue. She responds to people, but never starts a new subject of conversation, not even in her head. She wound up being the most beloved character in that series to my readers. (Yay!) I wrote her because I was trying to understand my autistic sons.

I have a series set in the 1920s with a main character who is a very precise, logical scientist. Her narration and dialogue use precise wording, lots of scientific jargon, and no poeticism. Her husband, an artist, speaks in flowery emotional terms. Their son, a telepathic baby dragon, speaks in vague childish terms because he doesn’t know English. Three very different writing styles at once. On top of that, I had to check every single word to make sure all the vocabulary was present in American English in the 1920s. (It was hard!)

I have another story set in a utopian future. I examined every word and idea carefully for negativity, and looked for ways to rephrase everything positively. The main character is in a difficult position, yet her attitude is gentle, kind, and grateful for all the good things she has (which are many). Every aspect of the word choice needed to reflect that.

I’m going to wax philosophical for a moment about why there’s no value in focusing on evil.

Evil is boring. It destroys choices. That’s its nature. Therefore, it’s boring.

Good creates new choices. That’s its nature. Therefore, it becomes increasingly more fascinating the more of it is present.

“Good versus evil” is a boring choice to focus on because it’s always the same choice, and there’s always the same only-one-right-answer. Ideally, it should be made only once: ideally, you choose “good” and never stray from it. (In practice, we often realize we haven’t been living up to our ideals and have to course-correct, but that’s not a new choice; it’s merely getting better at continuing to keep the choice we’ve already made.)

Every other choice possible falls under the heading of “good versus better versus best” or “good versus good.” And every single one is different. And what adds even more complexity and nuance is the fact that what is “good” for one person may be “better” for another, and vice versa.

For instance, I don’t like onions. Growing onions would be good, because I could give them away to someone who enjoys them. But growing garlic is better, because I like garlic, so I can eat it myself or share it. For somebody else, the reverse may be true.

Choices of “good versus better” and “good versus good” are where our personal identities form. Those are how we become who we want to become.

I love this quote from C. S. Lewis:

“We are not living in a world where all roads are radii of a circle and where all, if followed long enough, will therefore draw gradually nearer and finally meet at the centre: rather in a world where every road, after a few miles,forks into two, and each of those into two again, and at each fork you must make a decision. Even on the biological level life is not like a river but like a tree. It does not move towards unity but away from it and the creatures grow further apart as they increase in perfection. Good, as it ripens, becomes continually more different not only from evil but from other good.”

[MarkReed]

@Joseph_Lofthouse I’m not buying the E-prime thing at all. Balck and white situations do exist, absolutes do exist. It’s unfortunate that spirited debate isn’t possible on the internet, humor and good-natured jabs just don’t convey. They come off as insulting and confrontational, which is not my intent.

If I had you at my kitchen table, maybe with a chess board and bottle of brandy between us, I might explain my view in more detail. That chess board by the way is black and white. I made it to be black and white, I made it to be a chess board, I don’t play checkers.

I can’t help myself from indulging in a little bit of disparaging commentary but I 'll do it in E-prime. To this observer that linked website, “litemind.com” seems appropriately named.

[clweeks (Christopher Weeks)]

My perception of E’, from talking to other people enthusing about it, suggests that getting out of the habit of making godlike pronouncements about the world helps to craft a more collaborative way of thinking and communication, even when the users believe that some absolutes really do exist.

I tried it for a few days in the early 90s and found myself shutting down, paralyzed by the effort of reframing my communication patterns. But I was a kid (sort of) and might respond differently now.

[Joseph_Lofthouse]

I sure know the paralysis of trying to use E’ syntax.

E-prime deals with my own personal journey, and preferred way of interacting with the world, not with other people’s choices.

I’ve worked with e-prime for about a decade. It goes easier now.

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

Which is a great illustration of the point that what works well for one person can be totally wrong for another!

I completely agree there are things that are black and white. I think writing styles are a question of personal taste. Which doesn’t make them “grey” – it makes them “blue” or “green” or whatever. Present tense in fiction drives me up one wall and down the other, but there are people who love it, and I’m okay with that. I just won’t read it!

[Justin]

@UnicornEmily

On top of that, I had to check every single word to make sure all the vocabulary was present in American English in the 1920s. (It was hard!)

If you ever had to do that again, the thought just occurred to me - perhaps one could use a spellchecker but instal that dictionary (or whichever one for the project) as the system dictionary against which the spellchecker would check? Potentially such a setup could automate that work well.

(Your work sounds very interesting by the way).

[Justin]

@MarkReed

I’m not buying the E-prime thing at all. Balck and white situations do exist, absolutes do exist.

No they don’t - absolutely not!
Only joking

@MarkReed

It’s unfortunate that spirited debate isn’t possible on the internet, humor and good-natured jabs just don’t convey. They come off as insulting and confrontational, which is not my intent.

Spirited debate does exist on the internet. I have been on some forums on Facebook where some nice debate is possible, though in my experience it’s very common for admin on groups to abuse power in order to silence views that contradict their own preconceptions, and also censor things that make them look silly or harm their self-view. However, while good exchanges can be had in some corners of Facebook, I find things better in some forums for geeks. I’m a member of a Buddhist forum for example, where there’s quite geeky debate and back and forths with people quoting specific suttas and breaking down the Pāli grammar or etymology etc. It’s great! Maybe being Buddhist makes it easier since it’s obvious that communication should be compassionate, but also the topic of the forum being very geeky, focused around comparative analysis of the earliest sources of evidence on the BUddha’s teachings, that makes it attract geeks, so geeks like detailed rational discussion I have really enjoyed discussion there and learning has gone well in both directions.

Though yes for sure tone can be misunderstood in black and white writing. Some people don’t receive written rational detailed comments well!

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

(Chuckle.) Someone on a videogame forum once asked my husband accusingly, “Are you this pedantic in real life?”

He replied cheerfully, “Yes! Yes, I am!”

(He is, too. It’s one of the things I deeply love about him. He cares about precision and accuracy.)

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

That’s true! If an automated etymology-checker existed, that would be very useful tool for writing historical fiction! I wonder if anyone has programmed one?

An automated e-prime checker might be useful for someone who wants to use that writing style, too. I wonder if one exists?

Aw, thanks, Justin. If you send me a PM, I’d be happy to send you a free epub and/or PDF copy of any of my books that sound fun to read.

[Justin]

@UnicornEmily

That’s true! If an automated etymology-checker existed, that would be very useful tool for writing historical fiction! I wonder if anyone has programmed one?

Etymology? I had thought that you just wanted to check if the words were in 1920’s vocab? I mean, if your method was by using a 1920’s dictionary, then what I mean is, the spellchecker function on a computer is presumably working from a list of words, I would assume perhaps derived from a dictionary file? It might depend on the specific app, but could be worth looking into if needing to do that again one day. Just for example, there are such things as dictionary files, I have loaded several into my computer’s system so that I can look up Pāli and Sanskrit using the default dictionary app.

Hmm ok I just looked this up for you and sure enough, on a Mac at least it seems to work just the way my mind was going. See this page:
Check spelling, Pages Help.

You can set up your Mac to check spelling for different languages. Spell checking must be set to Automatic by Language.
[…]
If you have a dictionary file you want to use, copy it to the Spelling folder in your Library folder.

Then the only challenge would be to actually find the right dictionary file to match your writing project!

So kind of you to offer to send me your book, thank you so much! Unfortunately I have a number of books here which I would really love to read but all my reading time right now is taken up and they have been left unread for years! Right now I am focusing on my many plants, and studying up on methods, so many things to learn. I wish there were a local embryo rescue class I could go to for example! And lots of challenges making plants happy in tiny spaces indoors, though I am willing to put the effort in since it might be hard indoors but it’s impossible outdoors in this weather! It feels like good process at least…

I had better stop derailing this conversation from e-prime!

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

Etymology was what I checked to find out the historical usage of each word. (Etymology was also important to make sure the meaning hadn’t shifted with time, which occasionally it had.) Your idea would be good, too!

Now that you mention it, a language dictionary would probably be really easy to modify in order to optimize it for writing in e-prime. Just remove all forms of “to be” from the dictionary – “am,” “are,” “is,” “be,” etc. – and let the spellcheck and/or grammarcheck tell you automatically when you put one in.

[Hugo (Hugo Morvan)]

Great to hear you’re working on a French version of the book Joseph!! I’ll buy that to explain better to people what landracing is about. I will lend it out to interested people.
I have done some work with NVC.( Non violent communication). Very effective.

[Joseph_Lofthouse]

Emily: I implemented your brilliant idea about modifying the spellcheck dictionaries in my word processor, email, and web browser.

The email program now has the option for English-US, or English-prime. Word processor does English-prime only, but I could add the few deleted words to a custom dictionary as needed.

[Lowell_McCampbell (Lowell)]

@Joseph_Lofthouse I think you might enjoy this rhetorical idea. It was the only one that stood out vividly in what I remember from my intro to rhetoric. I think it points more to the “godlike” dominating aspects writing that e-prime is trying to address, and considers the interaction between the writer and audience as being participants with their own unique knowledge.

Beyond_persuasion_A_proposal_for_an_invitational_r.pdf (1.9 MB)

[UnicornEmily (Emily Martha Sorensen)]

Awesome! I’m glad I had an idea that helps!